If you're offering up some free prayers, I'll take a few...
There are a couple of things that have been weighing on my mind and my heart lately... most recently is an upcoming job interview this Wednesday. It is for a part-time RC postion at my alma mater, where I spent two wonderful years as an RA, and have always hoped God might call me back there some day to serve as an RC. There was an opening a year ago, but I was not ready yet. The amount I have grown in the last year astounds me, especially in my faith. Now that I'm pushing 25, I actually feel like an adult :)
My previous work with The Fish, showed me that it is entirely possible to impact the lives of those around you for good, but it also helped me to sort through my aspirations for the future. The Fish was owned by a publicly traded company, so when it really came down to it, it was responsible to its stockholders over its listeners. That is not what I want for my future. Investing money in a company is so temporary, but investing time and intangibles in a person and their eternal future can have an infinite yield. This is part of the reason I think I want to go back to teach college. Investing in the future of others is a wonderful opportunity, and I have a chance to live this dream as an RC.
I am really excited about my interview and this potential opportunity, but many of the current RAs I know have told me that the position has already been filled by a fellow former RA, and the interview process is only a formality. I desperately hope this is not true, but even if it is, I know that God will put the right person in this position, and He always knows best. I also know that if God does not have this RC job as part of His plan for my future, I will be very disappointed, and will be tempted to dwell too much on the negatives, so I am really praying for patience and acceptance during this time, regardless of the outcome.
The second area of unrest in my life is definitely more important, as it is spiritual. While I am still listed as a member at my former church, I have not been there in several months, as it just doesn't feel like the right "fit" for me in my life right now. I have every intention of transferring my membership, but I just can't find the one that feels right. The hardest part is that my parents have been attending the most wonderful church in my home town, but it is three hours away and I do not get home to visit very often. The church is so great that it makes it hard to find a church home here, because there is just nothing here like Woodlands and I find myself just wishing to be in a different place... if that makes sense...
I know I am where God wants me to be, even if it doesn't always make sense, and can be really uncomfortable not knowing everything about the future, but I my sister and I are getting along better than any other roommate I've ever had, and I'm almost finished with a grad program that feels like it was designed with me in mind (don't worry... I'm not so egocentric as to think that is the case). I know I cannot just move back home because I like the church there, but I am so hungry that it is looking pretty tempting.
There are churches I've visited that will have some elements I love, and other very important elements that just don't fit for me. I'm looking larger, but not too large that you feel like part of the scenery. Contemporary with the option for a traditional service with old school hymns every once in a while. Conservative doctrine with open hearts and open arms, and an enthusiastic youth group I can volunteer with. I am itching to volunteer with a youth group, and now that my grad program is almost over, I will finally have the time. And I hate getting up in the morning, so I really want the option of a Saturday night service.
I know this is picky, and a lot of these preferences are probably spawned by the fact that they are all elements I grew up with, so they are what I'm familiar and comfortable with, which I'm not sure is a bad thing, because they are great things to have in a church, but it can be dangerous when we start to get complacent about our faith, which is where I feel like I am heading. I need a church!
